Between the Two: A Series-Part 1

Intimidating. It’s a word women hear often. One spoken to them as a weapon, a reason for why they are dismissed, ignored, cut off from deeper relationship. It is spoken as though it were it were a compliment. “You have it together. You are strong, well-spoken, brave.” And yet, it is a compliment that cuts us off at the knees. What it really says is “No one knows what to do with you. You are too much.”

And in light of this statement, a question has been Sunday-strolling through the streets of my mind. Is the issue intimidating women or intimidated men? And does it even matter?

To explore this further, I’d like to invite you into the story of the very first couple. I encourage you to be open to hearing it in a new way. It may not settle well with you at first. It may buck against they way this story plays on repeat throughout the history of your faith. I understand. It is difficult to hear things in a new way. Let’s allow ourselves to struggle through it without simply disregarding the unfamiliar.

Since that dreaded moment in the garden, when Adam and Eve wandered their way to the one tree Adam knew would lead them away from what God offered, men and women have been at odds.

Eve, perhaps not knowing the whole picture having not been created when the warning was given to Adam, saw that wisdom and knowledge was available instantly through the sweet fruit of the tree. Wisdom and knowledge, they would be needed if the newly formed humans were going to fulfill their calling to cultivate and care for creation. Yet, there is a slow wisdom and knowledge, growing like an oak whose roots dig and fight their way through the earth as branches stretch further up and out toward the sun. But no one wants the slow-growing when they can have it now.

And Eve, the Ezer K’enegdo, the military force balance to the incomplete humanity of Adam, took the information she had and formed a strategy. She reached out her hand to the possibility of knowing everything they would need to be the most effective stewards; and Adam, himself knowing the full risk, joined her. They dined on instant gratification and passive hope.

And trust shattered.


Holy moly. What a year. There is so much to say and also zero of the right words to say it. My word coming into 2020 was “Dwell”.

I have major side eye for that. Really? Dwell? A little on the nose, don’t ya think?

Well, dwell I did. In my house, like the rest of the world. And lots of the fluff of life was stripped away. It was super uncomofortable and unfun. And the stripping away of comforts, false or otherwise, will continue to be a less than enjoyable experience.

I’m not here to tell you that 2021 will somehow mean all is well. Vaccine or not, the pandemic is still happening. All the votes are in and yet, the election is still unsettled. The protests have quieted a bit but Black bodies are still piling up because of a system that is set up for their failure.

So, a New Year’s Even countdown changes very little. No more than any sunrise. However, it does give us a grand opportunity to reflect and dream. I created some graphics to help you do just that. They are formatted to be instagram stories, but work just as well as tools to simple help you process. Enjoy! I’d love to hear your reflections.

Just for the sake of historical recording, here are some happenings in 2020 that boiled their way down to learning to dwell more than decorate this life with all the clutter.

Corona Virus stopped the world and we retreated, reluctantly to our caves. And the life of teaching middle schoolers became an entirely new adventure.

-The foundational white supremacy of this nation became impossible to ignore, though many still choose to walk about with their eyes tightly locked shut.

-Churches fell apart. Seemingly because of the pandemic and political divide. I’d argue it may possibly because God is inviting us to be a bit more creative and intentional in being The Church. But, hey, maybe I’m wrong. It wouldn’t be the first time.

The election. I cannot be nice about this one so I’ll just leave it at this: democracy is important and undeniably, deeply flawed.

There is infinitely more we could each add to this list. The personal battles of depression, divorce, death of loved ones and dreams… There is no end to the list of difficulties that 2020 gifted us. And true, there is no end to the goodness of God. But one does not cancel out the other. You can believe God is good and let a few choice words fly from your mouth about the wounds that were caused or unearthed by this last year. You can dwell, in stripped down honesty, with the King of your faith. You do not have to decorate the halls of your life with pretty words of a utopian facade in order to live this life well.

Just for a Smile

We are all go a little stir crazy, are we not? What better time to employ some creativity and share some joy? (Listen, creativity comes in spurts so if you fill tapped out, that’s cool. You do not have to produce anything in this season, but when it comes, let it overflow…like a toilet clogged with an abundance of toilet paper. Remember the days of abundant toilet paper?)